Imagine walking around with a universe in your head! Alive and screaming with life – lives – unlived. No, yet-to-be-lived. Because you know you will. In this lifetime, or the next or the next or the next. There is no choice.
It’s tough, walking around with that kind of burden.
My world is small. My immediate world, the tangible one. So small that it can’t hope to contain the cosmos that inhabits my head.
Maybe that accounts for the sinking feeling one gets sometimes, at the pit of the stomach… of time running out. What if…?
There’s so much to do! Feel, see, hear, touch, love…
My elder one has always urged me to travel. Alone. He noticed my itchy feet way before I did.
Appu, I owe you.
Ever looked out of the window of a running bus and caught the eye of a passing stranger…and experienced a moment of complete recognition, understanding? When the face splits open in a smile that makes no sense at all? Or felt an irrational excitement as the old bus you barely caught rattles up the hairpin bend of a narrow mountain road?
Oh joy! You look around and smile at your fellow passengers…and they look back at you unblinkingly. A little suspiciously, even. But even that is not enough to dampen your spirits.
You. feel. damn. good… About nothing at all.
Did I say, I love travelling? Even if it’s only till Kakkanad on a government boat blaring out old songs on a tinny radio? Or spending a king’s ransom on auto ricksha and visiting Fort Kochi for the nth time? Or stuck in the traffic on the narrow roads of Ooty, straining my neck to see the incongruously beautiful orange flower growing on the rubbish heap?
P.S. Note to self:
Pick up the bag, girl. Pack in the camera. And of course the purse. What are you waiting for?